Staying Grounded During the Holiday Rush — Kids Included
The holidays are supposed to be magical, right?
Family gatherings. School programs. Christmas lights. Cookies. Shopping. Parties. Traditions. Pictures. Gifts. Travel. And somehow, in the middle of all of that, we're also supposed to keep everyone fed, rested, on schedule and full of holiday cheer.
As a mom and someone who has spent many years working with children and families at the YMCA, I can tell you: sometimes the most wonderful time of the year is also one of the most overwhelming. And our kids feel it, too.
At the Y, our staff spend thousands of hours each year caring for, teaching, coaching and playing alongside kids. One thing we know is that children often communicate what they need through their behavior. During the holidays, routines change, bedtimes get pushed back, meals happen at different times, and there are more people, more noise, more sugar and a whole lot more stimulation.
Then we wonder why the meltdown happens over the wrong color cup.
Sometimes, it really isn't about the cup.
Give Yourself Permission to Do Less
One thing I continue to learn as a parent—and see in my work with families—is that our kids don't need us to create a perfect holiday. They need us to be present for the one we're actually having.
You don't have to attend every event or continue every tradition. Choose the things that really matter to your family.
Some of the memories our kids hold onto aren't the elaborate ones anyway. They're decorating cookies that didn't turn out quite right, watching the same Christmas movie for the hundredth time, driving around looking at lights or laughing about something completely ridiculous. Those ordinary moments count!
Keep a Little "Normal" in the Schedule
Kids thrive when they have some idea of what comes next. During the holidays, normal routines can disappear quickly.
You don't have to maintain a perfect schedule, but keeping a few familiar anchors can make a big difference. Protect things like regular meals, bedtime routines, quiet time and opportunities to move and play when you can.
It also helps to prepare children for what's coming.
"We're going to Grandma's house. We'll have dinner, open presents, play for a while and then head home."
It seems simple, but giving kids that roadmap can help them feel more secure when the day looks different than usual.
Remember: Behavior Is Communication
This is something our YMCA staff see every day.
A child who is whining, melting down, bouncing off the walls or suddenly refusing to cooperate may not be trying to make things difficult.
They might simply be done.
Hungry. Tired. Overstimulated. Nervous around people they don't see often. In need of movement. Or just desperate for a few quiet minutes.
Instead of immediately asking, "How do I stop this behavior?" it can help to first ask, "What might my child need right now?"
Maybe it's a snack. Maybe it's ten minutes outside. Maybe it's sitting somewhere quiet together. Maybe it's going home earlier than planned.
That's okay.
Let Kids Be Kids
Think about everything we ask of children at a holiday gathering:
Say hello. Sit still. Eat this. Wear that. Smile for the picture. Say thank you. Don't run. Be patient. Come over here.
That's a lot.
We can teach manners, gratitude and respect while still recognizing children's boundaries and personalities. A shy child may need time to warm up. An energetic child probably needs somewhere appropriate to move. A tired child might need a break.
Our YMCA staff work hard to create environments where children feel safe, included and known. We can bring that same mindset into our holiday celebrations.
Don't Forget to Play
Movement is one of the best resets for kids—and adults.
Take a family walk. Have a living-room dance party. Go sledding if Nebraska weather decides to cooperate. Visit the Y. Shoot hoops. Swim. Play outside.
It doesn't have to be a structured "workout." Sometimes we just need to move our bodies, laugh and reconnect.
Give Yourself Some Grace, Too
Our kids aren't the only ones who get overwhelmed during the holidays.
Parents and caregivers are carrying a lot. We're remembering gifts, coordinating schedules, planning meals, managing expectations and trying to make the season special for everyone else.
You are allowed to say no. You are allowed to change the plan. And you are allowed to have a holiday season that doesn't look like anyone else's.
At the YMCA, our core values of Caring, Honesty, Respect and Responsibility guide the way we care for children, families and one another. They can also be a helpful reminder to extend some of that same care and respect to ourselves.
Maybe staying grounded this holiday season isn't about squeezing one more thing onto the calendar.
Maybe it's about noticing when we've already put enough on it.
So slow down when you can. Put the phones away for a while. Let the kids play. Order the pizza. Skip something. Take the walk. Watch the movie.
Your kids probably won't remember whether everything went according to plan.
But they'll remember how it felt to be together.
And that may be the best kind of holiday magic we can give them.
~Carrie Walter
Youth & Family Engagement Director
Gretna Crossing YMCA
Youth & Family Engagement Director
Gretna Crossing YMCA